Mr. Whited

When I started this blog I realized that I would have to make a decision if I would disclose things that are extremely personal. There are many things which I write that I will never post on this site, but this is one thing I think I should put up here in order to share a piece of my character and hopefully encourage someone else…

I wrote this on new years day of this year after a party I went to. Feel free to discuss your thoughts in comments on this post:

This past night I attended a party at my good friend, Hayley’s house. We spent the night mostly dancing, celebrating the new year. We were having a wonderful time in our foolishness. There was of course nothing outright wrong with our dancing, but I’m sure we did appear rather silly.

At about one o’clock, Hayley’s father came home. Mr. Whited is among the most incredible men I have ever met. His disposition is most consistently jovial and kind. And yet, he demands more respect than most men I have known. And I am so proud to say that he has deemed me a respectable young man and seems to hold me in high regard. I remember there was a time that he payed me one of the greatest compliments I have yet received. I had recently asked his daughter, Hayley to be my date to the prom my senior year, and she accepted. Mr. Whited came to me and told me he could not think of any better man to take his daughter to the prom. This filled me with the greatest satisfaction. I cannot even describe it. Another time he encouraged me beyond words. His son, Jeffrey, is among the most delightful men I’ve known. He is now 32 years old, but he acts much younger. He is mentally handicapped from birth. Jeffrey and I have become good friends, and I enjoy his company. Mr. Whited once came to me and thanked me for treating his son with such respect, and he said he was impressed that I acted so naturally around him. I responded by expressing my love for Jeffrey. These two instances will forever be ingrained in my heart as some of the proudest moments in my life, not only because the words expressed were so full of exhortation, but because the speaker merits such awe inspiring respect that I cannot but think that the words he said were true of my humbled character.

As I said he came home last night to a houseful of crazy students ringing in the new year with reckless abandon and loud music. As I danced (rather badly) I watched him out of the corner of my eye. When one is in the presence of such a great man, one watches his actions, seeking to emulate them in his own life.  Sometimes he was videotaping the group, smiling happily. Other times he was simply watching, and once or twice I caught a look that cannot quite be described as an expression of joy, nor curiosity, nor tiredness, not even inquisitiveness. I believe he was simply thinking, as great men do when they assume no one sees them. Perhaps his thoughts were consumed with his beautiful daughter, what would become of her? Perhaps, he was overseeing the shenanigans cumulating to the destruction of his house that stands as the fruit of his labor and the determination to provide for his family. Perhaps his thoughts were on his wife, how he loved her. Or perhaps he was simply tired, and was thinking to himself that he would not be sleeping tonight with the music blaring so rudely.

Later that night, I said my goodbyes to my friend. As I was walking to my car, Mr. Whited, to whom I had neglected to offer my farewell burst from his front door to comment on the silly hat I was wearing and wish me goodnight. I waved enthusiastically and said, “I’m sure I’ll see you again before I go back to school.” He replied, “Oh yes, we’ll be seeing you soon.” Is it wrong to call a friend, and ask to be invited to her house, with ulterior motives of conversing with her father? I want to bask in the aura of my resounding respect for Mr. Whited.

I cannot help to think to myself, will I ever be a man such as he? This forces the question upon me, what exactly is it that I love and respect about Mr. Whited? It is not his responsibility, nor his hard work, not even his family that inspire me to write these things, although such things do demand respect. It is his affection, his love, and his kind words, that I admire most about that man. I will endeavor to be like him, to express kindness to all, as his example has shown me.